We spend so much of our time being swept up with other peoples ideas of what we should or should not be doing. Everywhere we turn, someone or something is willing to offer us their opinions and ways of doing things. When we are asleep we simply act and follow, like sheep.
When we begin to wake up, we see that it may not be that those should or should nots are offered up as a way to hurt us, but it is simply an act of unconsciousness that needs to be seen for what it is..unawareness. When we reclaim who we truly are, higher consciousness, and we begin to align our lives with our true callings, then we begin to tire of those who say you should or shouldn't do something. I call them, a case of the shoulds.
What does it mean to have a case of The Shoulds? It means that either you are telling someone what they should or shouldn't do, or you are allowing someone to tell you what you should or shouldn't do. How do you cure this disease of unconscious thought? By turning within. By feeling your body and your connection to yourself. By knowing yourself so deeply that you can discern what is right or not right for yourself.
Sometimes in life we need advice or guidance. Not all advice or guidance is infected with the shoulds...how do you tell the difference? When you are given the freedom to choose, and to choose freely, with whatever choice you make being honored, vs. judgement and negativity.
It is never our place to tell others what to do. We can guide lovingly, but be sure you are not attached to what is chosen. Love regardless...openly...and without judgement to someones choice.
We are shielded from childhood from the never ending bombardment of what is right or wrong, what to do or not to do, a parent seems to download the software program that sets into motion a dynamic set of systems that make us automatic should people. We look to older more 'wiser' adults to guide us on what is acceptable and what isn't and we move on from there.
I'm not saying there is anything wrong with following the seasoned guidance of those who have come before us...I certainly encourage one to seek out their wisdom...but wisdom doesn't come with you should, or you shouldn't. Wisdom comes from a place of all acceptance, non judgement, and love.
Be your own person. Design yourself. Discern what calls to you and what doesn't. Pick and choose your own life, and let others do the same. If you're a parent, embrace your perceived shortcomings, and remember to laugh at yourself and your children and put your arms around them at all times...give them and yourself the space to explore who you are at the core...
Teaching acceptance seems to be a great teaching of our time...we think we have walked free from racism, judgement, and other separating maladies of our world...but there is much work to do, because people are still suffering, still feeling pain, and still hurting themselves and others.
Lessons are learned yes, and some would say how would one become wise without suffering?
Perhaps...But perhaps it's time to step things up a notch, and move towards more acceptance of each other...and that starts with excepting yourself first.
Do what calls you...heal what is hurt...choose the colors of your life..and express them uniquely.
Until next time...Live well.